In this article, I share what I believe to be the single best parenting strategy for any situation.
The only way this advice can be improved is if someone else tells it better. Because the advice itself, is basically all you need to know about parenting well.
This isn’t a list of tips and tricks to gain more compliance or obedience with your child. It isn’t about threats or manipulation. It’s beneficial both in the long run and in the short term, and it never gets old or worn down.
What I’m sharing here is the one, single most effective parenting approach, that works best in any given situation or circumstance, and is guaranteed to deliver better results than any set of tricks or techniques.
I understand that there are a lot of parenting strategies and approaches out there. And if you’re anything like me, you’ve been through plenty of articles, books, videos and courses showing you the way to more or less enlightened parenting.
In this blog post, I’m going to just enlighten you to the whole thing right here and now.
With this foundational strategy, you will have a positive effect on your child in the long run AND you will also greatly increase your chances of gaining compliance and cooperation with your child.
Yes. What I am talking about is:
- Just one single strategy.
- Useful in every situation.
- Increases likelihood of getting the cooperation you’re after
- Beneficial in the long run for you and your child
- Never gets worn out
- Helps (doesn’t harm) your relationship
- Doesn’t involve threatening, manipulation or physical force
- Beneficial for your own peace of mind and well being
Sounds pretty amazing right?
The strategy that works
The strategy that works and has so many amazing benefits is this:
You have to become the most loving, caring, passionate, joyful, enthusiastic, understanding, appreciating and adoring
parent person that you possibly can be.
Now take a minute to let that sink in.
Notice it’s all about you, the parent.
It has nothing to do with fixing or changing or correcting or manipulating your child.
It’s about you becoming the most amazing person you possibly can be.
It sounds like a lot, yes. But you know it’s true, and I know it’s true.
Every parent knows this deep down inside.
There really isn’t much more to it than that.
Forget about trying to change your children and make them more calm and cooperative and respectful and kind and courteous and happy.
Because until YOU are calm and cooperative and respectful and kind and courteous and happy, you really have no right demanding it from anyone else.
Every parent that is the least bit enlightened to the concepts of peaceful, positive or conscious parenting knows all of this to be true.
And yet it’s what we resist so often. We make excuses, we fake our way around it, we try to turn the table back on our children.
But the truth of it always remains.
The reason why we resist, is because it always falls back on our own shoulders. It’s always about us, and about who we are in the moment, and that is hard to accept sometimes.
So forget about how our children are acting. How are we acting?
What energy are we bringing to the table?
The Real Question
The real question isn’t ever about how can we change our children.
The question is how can we change ourselves.
And is that not always the most important thing we can ask ourselves as parents?
Because here’s the thing. If you’re carrying an energy of neediness, of desperation, anxiety, anger, or something else that is broadcasting that you aren’t feeling content with your life and with your child as they are in that moment, then that is something for you to take a close look at and see where you can improve.
In any given situation, if you are 100% happy, joyful and content, then I guarantee, you will have more compliance and cooperation from your children.
Put it like this. What’s more likely to get your kids to cooperate, without resistance or defiance. A) When you’re asking from a place of neediness, anxiety, desperation and unhappiness, or B) When you’re coming from a place of joy, contentment, love and appreciation for your child.
We all know what the answer is.
Don’t let the negative, fearful mind fool you. I’m not saying it’s easy. I know I’m not always happy, joyful and content. I definitely am not. But just because we struggle with it, doesn’t make it less true.
So the only thing left to do, is to try to get yourself to that place of full-on joy, appreciation, happiness, passion for life, adoration for your children, zeal and enthusiasm for life.
This is on our shoulders as parents. But is it such an awful place to try to get to? Is it so bad to set the goal for yourself to find happiness and purpose and joy and appreciation?
It’s on our shoulders, but it’s also not about blame.
Think about what’s really being asked. Is it not a win-win for both you and your child?
Now here’s the takeaway. Here’s the homework. The practical, daily effort you can start doing so that you can start getting the results you’re really after, which is a peaceful, positive, happy and healthy home.
Change your own attitude.
Change your own thoughts and habits and energy and beliefs. Meditate, pray, exercise, eat better, get coaching or counseling or therapy, whatever you have to do.
Start working on getting yourself to that elevated place of contentment and passion, and forget about trying to fix and control and correct your children. Changing them is the wrong place to focus on.
Focus instead, on the one parenting strategy that actually works.
Being the most outrageously loving, joyful, positive, optimistic, appreciative, respectful and contented parent that you possibly can.
You deserve it. Your child deserves it.
Any questions, just ask.
Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed it, share with your friends and social media. Doing this would mean a lot to me, and it will help other people to see the story.
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